Candid advice from Dr. Linda French
Got a problem? Don't worry,
Linda is here to help you. This is my section to air my completely
biased opinions about your problems with the rest of the world.
I promise that I will NOT be politically correct. That was for
the 90's. If you don't like what I have to say, go yell at the
guys who administer this web page. Or calm your anger by
purchasing bar stuff from our online store. Either way, don't
come to me about it.
Ask your question now!, or read what others have asked below:
Your web site
My name is Missy Langer and I am Barb Robbs sister. I added you to my web site as a favorite link (My favorite bar in Ypsilanti), just wanted to be sure that was ok. Thank you,
-Julie Robbs aunt
Dear Julie Robbs aunt,
Thanks...that is great..say Hi to the whole family!
Do You do outside catering?
I am from Ann Arbor and I was at a party in an auto museum the other nite and the food was wonderful. I was told my the host that the Sidetrack catered it. Do you do catering outside the area? I am interested in having a fancy wine party at Christmas for our office staff and a few clients, probably around 60 people and we want hot and cold finger foods. We would like something along the lines you served at that party. I called the Sidetrack and was told that the girl who handles this would be off for a few days. Can you help me?
Dear Barbara Forester,
Yes, we can help. Please call 483-5230 and ask for Taira or myself and one of us will be able to help you. We have catering menus that start from 6.50 a person on up. We can do your "finger foods" or we can do custom dinners Not only can we cater your party but we can do the bar too! We can put on a great wine tasting in the middle of your party. It is lots of fun and very very social. BUT>>>>try booking your party at the unique bar next door..you get the ENTIRE bar to host your party in at NO CHARGE. The bar boasts a 20 foot restored Victorian Back Bar that comes fully stocked and includes a bartender of your choice from the S'Track... Think about it...no mess, no cleaning of your house and lots of great parking!
I have a niece that says I am her favorite aunt. Should I believe her?
When she said "you're my favorite aunt" did she ask for money or the car? If not, then believe her. I have quite a few neieces myself and they are all my favorites..so what does that tell you?
I am writing you today about a rather serious matter. For years my friends and I were faithfully at Sidetracks twice a week. We loved it there. However, in the past year we have not been coming around because of an assumed position of Sidetracks concerning Ozone House Youth and Family Services. And that position is a negative one.
Let me just say we are not entirely sure of your position on the presence Ozone House in the downtown area and wanted to give you the benefit of the doubt before carrying on our boycott any further. We LOVE sidetracks and want to be there drinking great beer and eating yummy food! However, we also need you to support the youth of ozone house: the youth of Ypsilanti.
Please know that the opinion expressed here represents a large number of your patrons (even if they can't stay away from fried pickles)! We really think that Sidetracks should support beer lovers and its larger community.
We'd be happy to talk to you further if you so desire-- or to send you a list of names of people who would like to see Sidetracks support Ozone House and/or those who would like to return!
Beer drinking community member
-beer drinking community member
Dear beer drinking community member,
Dear Beer Drinkers,
You are right, this is a serious matter. We have purposely NOT taking a position on this as a lot of my customers are either connected to Ozone house, support Ozone House, want Ozone moved or donate to Ozone House. We support a lot of causes and non profits in the city but mostly we support good beer and food. People on both sides of this are good customers at the Track...I hope you view us as the type of place that everyone can converse openly and have conflicting ideas but can still pound a few with discussing it! Come back ..I would love to talk to you about this
How do you stay so young and beautiful? Do you drink a special type of beer? If so, is this beer available at the Sidetrack? Are you single? Will you marry me? I have 12 cats, 6 dogs and a pig. Do you like animals?
If you don't want to marry me, perhaps I can wait tables in your restaurant? I have had almost 3 hours of experience working at a Coney Island but got fired. It wasn't my fault! Someone asked, "What do you recommend?" and I said, "Nothing. Go to the Sidetrack."
Dear Sidetrack Billy,
I think it is all the red bull I drink! Most people don't know it, but I am actually 78 years old! (yes, the magical red bull is available at The Track) And about this whole marriage thing- I regret to inform you that I am taken. At this time I have a husband, two boyfriends and my very own pool boy- too bad. I am sorry to hear about the Coney Island, but you must really be a huge loser. Good thing we are not getting married!
What's the status?
Can you put me in touch with someone who knows the status of Frog Island Brewery and their purported move from Lansing to Ypsi? I love their beers, and I would like to talk to someone about the brewery operation. Sorry to bug you with this question here, but their "under construction" web site shows up as a link on yours, and I don't know where else to turn. Thanks.
-Frog Island Fan
Dear Frog Island Fan,
Well..well, you have come to the write website. The brewer of Frog Island beer just happens to be my brother. You can contact him at email@example.com and his name is Dave French. He has a lot to say about his "under construction" sign. Mike O'Brien and Dave are the true beer geeks of Ypsi..stop into the Sidetrack and I will buy you a pint of Frog and introduce you to the big guy..
going to California with Sidetrack in my heart
Two of my good friends are mooving to California at the end of July and are interested in having a going away gathering somewhere. However, they had mentioned that Frenchie's had very limited drink options. Is there any way to get the same great food and drinks that Sidetrack has to offer?
Dear Ypsi Radio,
Frenchie's can do just about anything you want(to a legal limit)...you can order off the regular menu or the catering menu. You can pick 5 of any of the S'Tracks great 16 tap beers and have them served at Frenchies (Bottles brews are unlimited). Hey, some folks choose to just drink and skip the eating entirely.
We miss the sauce!
Can we please have the recipe for the sauce you serve with the sweet potato fries? We loved everything at the Sidetrack but unfortunately have moved to San Francisco which makes running over for a burger and fries a bit more difficult. We have tried to make the sauce out here....but just cannot seem get it right. We promise not to tell anyone your secrets...we just want to enjoy a bit of home.
Dear Sweet Potato,
email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I will give it to you. San Francisco, huh? why in the world would you leave lovely Ypsi or that place?
I read Side track tTrivia and am more than willing to keep my mouth shut about the "real " truth If coupons are pending. P.S Give the coupons to the homeless cause I can afford to pay for my beer now but would love to tell the true story of Linda French to all who will listen. I know how she fought the english for a trea bag.. the true story will come out linda so be carefull. Beside your Moms not dead I talked to her the other Night.
-A relative or friend if you don't want to clam me
Dear A relative or friend if you don't want to clam me,
Aunt Joanne! Get off the internet, stop browsing the dating sights and no more ordering baubles from ebay! I thought we talked about this- now get your butt back to the casino and make us some $$!
Friends of the Freighthouse
I would like to contact the Friends of the Freighthouse but have not been able to find any contact info.
You can contact me at email@example.com directly and I would be glad to help you with anything you need. The friends of the Freighthouse need all the help they can at this time. The love of the freighthouse and keeping it open for public use is in the best interest of the entire community. You can also contact Leslie Chase at Ledbeaken@aol.com. Now go drink a beer and write us an email!
Dear Linda, got the order of beer glasses and tees that you sent to me at Ocean Spray in Henderson, Nevada. They were a big hit! Others are asking how to get theirs so I'm sending them to the website. Ever think of the "Sidetrack Casino"?, Vegas could use the venue! None of the "corner bars" out here have that home feel. Will stop in on my next trip back.
Thanks again, Hawk.
Glad your staff liked the shirts and glasses. Now go put twenty in the slots for me and then send me my winnings. My staff and I will be out next week to open that corner bar with our winnings...see you when you come to town
Shitty Pours on Excellent Beer
I've been a Sidetrack customer for four years because of the excellent beer/buck value. The last few months that I came in the 'trax I ordered Guinness and EVERY time it was a shitty pour. The glass was BROWN all the way down. The last time I came in it was like that AND it was in a plastic cup. After I finished it the waitress came by and promised glass instead of plastic and I said "only if its poured right." Beer comes - same problem! Terrible pour!!! That was the last straw for me. Things seemed to have gone downhill at the 'trax. I vowed that would be the last beer I payed for at the 'trax. But then my my brother urged me to write in an online suggestion rather than just boycott my favorite watering hole.
The Guinness Gospel: Glass at 45 degree angle, touching the tap. Pour slowly until it's 2/3 full. Let it settle until the beer is all black. Then fill the rest up using the same procedure and let set until there's only Guinness and head, no brown.
Looking forward to a good pint,
Thanks for the info...Lots of new bartenders in training now. Stop in and talk to the nite manager he will let you show the bartenders how to do it right! Ever had a shot of butterscotch schapps in it? excellent and I am Irish
bubbling dreams of love
Iím a teen boy with bad acne who goes to the sidetracks bar to drink sprite and eat sweet potatoes after having a bad at school. What do I do to get into the complicated heart of an grown adult waitress and prove to her that Iím a man and she can love me for who I am regardless of my yellow teeth and hatred for school homework.
P.S. Linda I think of you as a mature dominant female, please give me words of wisdom
Dear sprite boy,
Forget the 'grown, adult waitress'! Have you met my daughter?! You sound like just her type! Next time you are in, ask for Jessica, I am sure she will buy a sprite and, if you are lucky, she might even do your homework for you.
We want to come back
About 7 years ago, my husband (at the time a pilot at Willow Run and 3-times-a-week regular) ran afoul of you over a parking matter (he had come to Sidetrack to eat & drink). I think it had something to do with paying for event parking, or some other unusual circumstances.
Anyway, the story I've gotten is that there was some exchange about it and that you gave him the boot. He was mad because he ate & drank there all the time and felt he was treated unfairly (he wasn't going anywhere but Sidetrack).
Now, my husband, God love him, has a touch of the stubbornness and has refused for these 7 long years to come back. It doesn't seem like it should be such a problem, but it is still stuck squarely in his craw.
The problem is that all of our friends and I love the place (and so does he!), but it is always ruled out in the end. I'm not sure about the he-said-she-said, but maybe you can help all of us out of this impasse?
I don't know how much longer I can make it without those clam strips and Oberon......
Pilots are my favorite people so I am surprised we didn't iron this out over a beer. Tell him I am sorry and that if he comes in, I will buy him an Oberon or two and explain that pain in the butt event parking issue we have. Boy, he really holds a grudge. I am glad you are married to him and not me!
Why Don't We Have This is Jersey?
While visiting Michigan a couple weeks ago, I stopped by the Sidetrack and had the best tasting blend ever. Our waitress said it was called a "Caramel Apple". Well, I'm not a big beer/ale drinker but THAT was awesome. Unfortunately, I live about 600 miles away. Can you tell me what ingredients you use to make that blend? I need something to keep me until I can get back out your way again.
And the food was great too! We really enjoyed your restaurant. Hi to Tara.
Hey Jersey Girl.... A pint of "Carmel Apple" is Guinness and Woodchuck Cider mixed half and half. I guess any Cider might work but Woodchuck is one of the best.
Glad you like our place now come back and drink more beer!
House of Pain
What exactly is in a "Sidetrack House of Pain" cocktail. Sounds interesting and we all know that you can't really enjoy pleasure without a little pain.
If I told you what was in it, I would have to tie you to a chair, bound and gagged, and make you understand what we really mean when we say 'Sidetrack House of Pain'. I don't think either of us wants that, so why don't you keep coming in and stop asking so many questions! Just Kidding, feel free to ask your favorite bartender next time you are in...
Do you want a picture of the train wreck
I couldn't find your e mail address to send a copy of a picture of a painting of the train wreck that gave your building the side patio. It was published in an Italian magazine and offered on e-bay. My son in Florida sent me a picture of the painting.
Dear Jan Anschuetz,
Hi Jan, Yes, we would love to acquire that picture for our walls. My email is firstname.lastname@example.org, please contact me! Tell your son...Ringraziamenti per il cavo ed il tempo prossimo siete negli Stati Uniti, arresto dentro e li comprerÚ una birra
Where are they?
I don't see Fried Green Tomatoes or Irish Pub Egg Rolls on your menu - what's up??
Dear Little One,
Who's menu are you reading anyway? The Irish Pub rolls are still there but the fried green tomatoes are on vacation. They go south in the winter and return with the snowbirds. They hate the cold and suffer from seasonal depression. They usually return around Memorial Day to help open the outside patios.
I was wondering if Sidetrack would be interested in sponsoring our softball team. We are a team made up of mostly EMU students and Sidetrack regulars playing at Canton Softball Center. We would most definitely be in at the Sidetrack more often, like Sunday nights after our victories! And also wearing jerseys sporting the Sidetrack name would bring more business as well.
We will definetly sponsor you if you are good or maybe even if you are not so good. Remember, Sidetrack's other team went all the way to Vegas in the tournaments! Maybe you could even play in our beer games with our staff. Now, they are really good. If you have never seen AmyLynn run bases or Mel throw a ball then you haven't seen real baseball in action. We are thinking amount getting a game together to play against Washtenaw County Jail so all our staff would get a chance to play.
Depot Town Radio
This more a "confession" than a question...
I am a "Rockabilly Rebel Pirate" with a penchant for running an enjoyable radio station. 89.5 seems to causing quite a stir among those in and around Depot Town. Check it out... we're currently programming 60's & 70's pop, doowop, soul & country music, as well as voice drops, in automation. However, we'll be going live soon with the same stuff.
-Cap'n Johnny Danger
Dear Cap'n Johnny Danger,
You are great! Your station has caused quite the stir in and around Depot Town. Love the music, keep it coming. I do not what basement you are broadcasting from but the Sidetrack would like to run some ads??
gambler from novi
I'll will be at your establishment tonight and am looking forward to the Sweet potato fries. I was wondering if you had Club Keno? Also, would you consider joining rewards network for those of us who eat out alot and like to get a little reward? P.S. I loved reading about the history and trivia of the Sidetrack.
Dear golf nut,
Well, well, we just got into the Rewards Network Program so now you can eat sweet potato fries, drink beer and get a discount to boot!
A man walks into a pub and sits down next to a man with a dog at his feet. "Does your dog bite?"
A few minutes later the dog takes a huge chunk out of his leg.
"I thought you said your dog didn't bite!" the man says indignantly.
"That's not my dog."
If you think that joke is funny, you have been drinking too much at The Sidetrack. I suggest you take a few days off and contact me when you are sober.
Can you help?
I was in the Sidetrack on Monday at lunch and met your bartender, How do I get a date with her? Can you help?
-Big Guy 11
Dear Big Guy 11,
Try losing 20 lbs and winning the lottery!
My boss is an ass
Every time he opens his mouth I want to punch him. Drinking heavily only makes this worse ... what should I do?
Dear Sloppy Joe,
I take it you work in Depot Town! Things will not get better. Get a new job!
I really would like to work at the Sidetrack. I am currently without a job and have always wanted to work at your place. Can you help me get a job?
No! But come in and drink our beer anyway!!
I have been coming to the Sidetrax for years. I am gay but everyone there has always known me as "straight" I would like to come out of the closet but what do I say to everyone? Do I wear something special so that people will know what is going on with me. I can't just come in screaming "I'm Gay I'm Gay" Can I?? What do you suggest?
Come through our door screaming "I'm queer and I'm here and I need a martini"! That's what everyone who's coming out of the closet does at the Sidetrack. Billy? Is this you?
Charlie Harrison need to get Charlie Dixon address if you have it.
Charlie Harrison has something to send him , that he doesn't what him to know who it is from.
It's a poem Charlie Dixon wrote in school.
If you have his address, would you please send to me.
Love Cindy Harrison ( Gearns )
Lack of Specials
Why haven't you placed the specials on your web site yet? Are you planning on keeping us in suspense until we come down there? We may be alergic to your special of the day and need to know that before hand so we can plan to go to our other favorite place to eat,"Roy's Squeeze In". Of course we may find that we're alergic to the horse that Roy puts in his Squeeze Burgers too! Guess I won't go there ether. I'll just have to go hungry or I'll have to eat something else off the menu. Come to think of it, my only known alergic reaction has come from radio-active iodine. I don't think that it is included in any of your recipies though so I guess I'm safe. I am afraid that you may be mad at me for this letter, that's why I use the alias above.
You're not old enough to drink beer!
How do I sign up for your mailing list
Drink beer at the Sidetrack!
I am hopelessly in love with one of your waitresses. Is it O.K. to slip her my phone number or should I just ask her out?
If you ask me, I think you should go with something much more grand- like a marcihng band or a banner flown behind a plane that confesses your love. You could even get a tattoo of her face across your chest! If those ideas are not up your ally, you could always wait until she is off work and buy her a beer :)
HI LINDA I JUST WANT TO TELL YOU THAT I NEED MORE MONEY BECOUSE IM A FAST COOK AND I HAVE THE SKELLS TO PROVE IT I WOLD LIKE TO MAKE ADOLLAR MORE CAN WE TALK ABOUT THIS LINDA I WOULD LOVE YOU FOREVER
Dear Hotboy , Even though I love you too I cannot find it in my heart to give you that raise since you are currently sitting in the Washtenaw County Jail. When you get out we will discuss this! Word to the wise "Don't bend over in the shower"
Last fall I visited your great state and left a pair of shorts at one of my best friend's house. Summer will be here soon and that is my favorite week of the year, here in Minnesota. Can you help me?
She also promised to send me a Ben Franklin hat and T-shirt but I'll be glad to buy those when this site begins taking orders. Do you make shirts that will fit small farm animals?
Charlie-No-Hat (shortless in Minneapolis)
Dear Charlie aka Tom Dixon, I am KEEPING the shorts so stop asking for them back! I will, however, I'll send you some shirts for your small farm animals..what the heck do you do with those smalll farm animals? hmmmm interesting
It was nice talking to you last Saturday after lunch. You may not remember me, but I am probably the only one who asked you if it would be possible to take some train pictures from the 3rd floor window of the Side Track.
I would like to pursue that picture opportunity some sunny Saturday or Sunday. How do I best go about it? The trains usually pass thru town at about noon and another at 2pm. Does this fit in with your normal work schedule?
If you would, please let me know. Thanks.
Dave, of course I remember you! You're the guy with the skirt and wig ??...Yikes No, really you can take pictures from the 3rd floor anytime you like. The view of the trains is great.
I recently came to Sidetrack for my very first time and was VERY pleased with your burgers. In fact I would go so far as to say they are the best in the AA area--Casey's would be 2nd, in my opinion.... I think it really is the freshly ground meat that gives you guys the edge.
HOWEVER, one third of a pound just ain't big enough! Sorry, but it's just gone too darn quickly and when you eat something as amazingly tasty as a Sidetrack's burger you just want it to go on and on......
I bet if you were to offer a half-pounder you would have MANY takers!!!
Dear Gourmand...your letter just won you a round of drinks..stop in and identify yourself! I think your suggestion is a good one and I am going to try adding a 1/2 lb. burger to the menu. Thanks for the compliment on the burgers!
Mantel on the menu
How can I get a hold of a FAB mantel like the one you have in the back of your restaurant???
Dear Lily Munster,
Hello Lily Munster, I got that beautiful mantel from Materials unlimited ..who got it out of a mansion in Boston just for the Sidetrack! Check them out..1 block from the Sidetrack
This has me stumped
Why do baseball managers wear uniforms?
Dear Amanda Hugginkis,
I dunno ..does anyone know? That is a GOOD question...hmmmm you stumped me
Do you link to sites?? jack has one noW!!!
Hi Wendy...are are now linked!
My wife and I are regulars. We brought our daughter in for dinner and she would like one of your waitress shirts with the message about beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. HELP! When you see me you will know who I am. Anyway she wants a black one. I can come in anytime and purchase it. David Barnaby
I have good news and I have bad news. We are now selling the black ones but we no longer have them in stock since the weather got colder. The same shirt in long sleeves is arriving next week. Stop in and buy one!
Who's the Guy...
Who's the guy, in the picture of the bar, with the Steelers hat on. He looks scary. I am a Houston Texican Fan. Will he hurt me, if I come to the Side Track ?
Baby Blue 4ever
Dear Texican Fan,
Dear Baby Blue, The guy in the picture is "Steeler Mike" and he WILL hurt you!..especially if you are a Texas fan and you call your self "Baby Blue". He is very verrry scary until you put a Honey Brown down in front of him..then he becomes mellow. Come in and buy Mike a beer..you'll see
Why are we not on your page of links? have we offended you? Please be our friend again, link your site to ours
Dear Materials Unlimited,
Oh MY.....you could NEVER do anything to offend me...I love you guys. I will put the best Antique Shop back in my links!!
I reciently moved away from my mother for the first time. Although she is a crazy women I miss her very much. How do Ilet her know this without sounding like a homesick freshman?
Dear Lil' Poochie,
Dear Lil' Poochie, I am sure you love your mother very much and that she loves you too, but that aside ..have you ever sent her a fur coat or some diamonds or even a fifth of Jack Daniels? I'll bet you haven't, right? Try that and she will love you forever...try it
I was in last weekend and saw an Angel working behind the bar. Is Penny single?
What a babe!.
How can I contact her?
Dear cupids target,
Dear Cupids Target,
Sorry, but we do give out the "dating" status of our employees. But, I will pass this on to Penny when she gets back from her last series of operations for her sex change.
Central Business Community reschedule
I just got a 'jarring' from John Milford, calling per a rescheduling of your speaking at a future meeting.
January is booked; unsure of Feb, March, April. Did Mike Eller contact you already? I apologize if this duplicates his contacting.
Just let me know, so I can pass it on to John.
email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org
Dear Maggie Sell,
Hi Maggie, I think we are scheduling this in the summer months, right?
JUST READ YOUR BIO AND THOUGHT IT WAS HILARIOUS.BUT HOW DO I GET IN TOUCH WITH THE HELLMAN GIRL. IS SHE HOT OR WHAT!
Dear DR. TOM,
Dear Doctor Tom,
Don't you recognize her??? She is our cleanup guy Scott in drag..still think she is hot?
I have this crushing desire and need to know how I can solve it. I want...no need a bottle of Great Lakes Burning River. Unfortunately I am almost 2000 miles away. Would you drink one for me and let me know that it was excellant?
I drank not one but SIX for you. You are right, it is good beer. Any other beer you want me to try?
I know you don't manage this website, but I'm sure you know who does! Howz about having him put a link to:
on the "Links" page, and tell him to update the "upcoming Events" page at least once every 3000 years! lol!!!
PS: We have a link to you guys up on our site. (looking forward to ST. Patrick's Day)
Dear Jeff Brawler,
I added your link. I love you guys (maybe not as much as your wives)I do manage most of the S'Track site..soon I will be doing all of it ..also the Frenchie's website (you can win prizes on that one)
I'm sitting down here in Florida. The weather is perfect, but I'm just not happy! I miss the great happy hour at the ST! I can't find a place here with same great deals on my favorite beverage....
What do I do?????
Well Flyboy, Do you want us to bring you down some of your favorite brew?s I could do that or you could go visit my brother Skip who owns a bar in Dunedin, Fla. The name of his bar is "Skips Bar and Grill" and it is right on the bike path in downtown Dunedin.Stop in to "Skip's" and I am sure he will honor our Happy Hour...remember...just ask for Skip or Pam
I'm sitting down here in Florida. The weather is perfect, but I'm just not happy! I miss the great happy hour at the ST! I can't find a place here with same great deals on my favorite beverage....
What do I do?????
What the heck are you doing in Florida? NEVER FEAR, we continue to offer our Great Happy hour even in Florida! My brother Skip, owns a wonderful bar and grill in Dunedin, Fla. (outside Clearwater)He will honor our happy hour if you mention our name ..anyone going to that area, please stop in to the Sidetrack before going as I have some baseball caps I need delivered to him..He has a great burger and cheap beer..Say Hi to Skip, Pam (S'Tracks old bartender)and Karen and wear sunscreen
what's going on with your upstairs?
What is going on with your upstairs? My girlfriend and I need studio space and an apartment, any chance that we can rent from you? Jason
-Jason and Suzanne
Dear Jason and Suzanne,
There will be apartments on the 3rd floor. We are still in the design phase. We had a problem with getting a second means of exit out the back. That problem was finally solved a couple of weeks ago...watch for construction to start and then get back to me! I promise they will be extra special and worth the wait.
What should I do with my life?
Try getting one!
The Bells Amber on tap is gone!
When will it be back?
Dear Clark Kent,
We are in process of switching into our Spring and Summer brews. I know it is tough, but please be patient. We put on Bell's Oberon and we are bring back Bell's Porter for the SUMMER next week. Bells Amber will be back shortly..lots of new brews coming up..So much beer, so little time!
I was wondering how we could purchase a brick for a fellow coworker that is retiring.
Dear Sandy Riley,
Contact the DTA ..or stop in the Quinn's store at the end of the block..or the Riverside Arts Center is also selling bricks contact the Downtown DDA call the city 483-1100 and ask fodr Jennifer Goulet
dear lindameister, i was recently in your brothers bar in dunedin, florida. my question is this..."is that pretty girl karen available?". i talked to her for a couple of hours and she certainly seemed that way, but i'm not sure how to act when i go back.
i'm all about girls with lots of hair and snappy attitudes (she chastised a couple of guys while i was there!), but i heard she and your brother had a thing.
don't want to step on any toes! what's up?
She does have a lot of hair and boy is she snappy...toes, what toes? Skip's toes cannot be stepped on...go a head and ask her out..I can't imagine she would not go...she truly needs a break form those 6 crying kids
Need money for beer
I am in a dilima, I want to drink beer this weekend but have given it all to my landlord for rent. Any ideas of what i can do?
-The poor drinker
Dear The poor drinker,
Do you know how to wash dishes? If not, order a beer at the Sidetrack without money and you will learn how to...real fast..and Dana will teach you!
what happend to the woodchuck
whats up with taking woodchuck off the draft list, I loved coming in during happy hour and having one. Will it be back?
Dear woodchuck fan,
OK..how much wood can a woodchuck chuck? Say it real fast 5 times to the bartender and I will bring it back. It will be back again, I promise. There are sooo many great summer beers that we are thinking of adding 4 more draft lines to our 16 existing ones. (Woodchuck got bumped to put Bell's Oberon on)We do have it in the bottle...stay tuned
THIS IS NOT A QUESTION
THIS IS NOT A QUESTION. I JUST WANT TO SAY I HAVE BEEN TO THE SIDETRACK BAR ONCE BEFORE AND I MISS IT! I HAVE BEEN STATIONED IN KOREA FOR AWHILE NOW AND IM FINALLY COMING HOME FOR AWHILE AND I CANT WAIT TO COME BACK TO THE BAR AND SET FOOT ON AMERICAN SOIL. SEE YOU ALL IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS.
We can't wait to see you too! Identify yourself and I will pick up your tab. Good job soldier..what the heck is this "stoney" stuff? hmmm
The guy bartender
I was in Sidetrack for the first time this week and I sat at the bar with your bartender Mike, and I have to compliment you on him. Funny, smart, and one of the best bartenders I have seen in quite sometime!! He is such a keeper. Is he married? single? I will come back to the Sidetracks because of him!!! Please pass it on to him.
Dear New Visitor,
Glad you discovered the S'Track. Mike is a keeper but not for long. He is moving south to Ohio. Mike is really a producer and actor..and a fine one at that. He has many many awards and will one day be famous. Is he married or single?...hmmm ask him
goddess of light, i'm confused! i love your place and i enjoy "Skips" in florida. i can't decide where to live!
Sidetracks has you, fantastic food and attractive women.
Skips has great food, sunsets and the Flamingo Hotel.
What should I do?
I'm more than willing to follow your lead, but, I need to know! Karen keeps asking me to commit in Florida and Jenny keeps asking me to commit in Michigan!
Should I tell Karen to keep pedaling? Or should I tell Jenny to keep rowing?
I would tell Karen to keep pedaling and Jenny to keep rowing...instead take me to Florida! As for the Flamingo Hotel...you stay there????? Are you renting the rooms by the half or the hour?
The directions on the Sidetrack web site say, "To reach us from I-94, exit Huron Street and turn LEFT onto Huron." The problem is that these directions assume that everyone traveling to Sidetracks is coming from the West. I was going to be asking some friends of mine from Grosse Pointe to meet me at Sidetracks and I was going to direct them to your web site but following the directions would take them far, far from where I want them to be. What do you think about making your directions page more friendly to folks East of Ypsilanti?
Dear Map Police,
Youare absolutely right! I have turned this over to our Web Police and it should be corrected soon. Thanks for taking the time to tell me...stop in and I will buy you a beer
are you connected?
Are you connected to the other bars in the area? Your seems so different..why?
Sorry, we are not connected to any other bars in the area. The S'Track and Frenchie's is owned and run solely by Linda French and daughter, Jessica (when not at school). A lot of people think the bars in the area are connected...not so! Different, hmmmm...what do you mean by that
What's in a shape?
Driving past the Ypsilanti water tower the other day, I began thinking "Why don't water towers look like this any more?". There's the juvenile answer, but I would seem to think that it's more than just aesthetics. So, why is it that water towers are shaped like an upside down decanter??
Dear Tower Seeker,
I wish I could give you a more sophisticated answer but I've gotta tell ya- the shape of modern water towers has changed in an effort to cut down on traffic accidents caused by gawking motorists, incidents of public indecency caused by 'randy passer bys' and to decrease the problem of immaculate conception that plagued Ypsilanti from 1907-1976.
I was scouting out your calendar of UPCOMING EVENTS and became confused. The listing begins with 2010, then changes to 2009.
In the process, I slipped and hit my head on the bathroom sink. (Don't ask me why I have internet in the dunny.) Fortunately, I invented a flux capacitor.
Do you know where I can get ahold of a DeLorean, so that I can get Back to the Future?
Dear Doc Brown,
So sorry about the confusion... Jessica 'Frenchie' has been known to have a few too many Happy Hour beers and take to the internet. Given that she never quite got the hang of blogging, she has been known to 'drunk event page manage' from time to time. Kids, what are you gonna do?
The events page should be up and running to 'sober standards' now. (If not, just come down to Sidetrack, have a few Happy Hour beers and the whole thing will make a lot more sense!)
My husband and I visited your restaurant for the first time last Saturday. I had your black bean burger since I have been watching my weight and it ROCKED! I wasn't hungry for 7 hours. I need that recipe. I live too far away and anything that keeps me fueled for that long needs to be in my recipe box.
Are you sure it was our black bean burger that kept you fueled for all that time? Are you sure it wasn't the crystal meth? We heard that stuff will keep you up for days!
Seriously though, I'm glad you liked the black bean burger- we make it by hand, from scratch, using fresh ingredients and a recipe that was born in our very own kitchen!
Peg Leg Lost
Last night I was in your bar and had a really good time. The problem is, I had such a good time that I left my peg leg behind. Did you guys find it this morning?
I really need it as I have to be to work and I do not want my boss to know what that I got drunk and lost my leg.
I sure hope you found it.
-Legless in Ypsi
Dear Legless in Ypsi,
I hate to tell you this, but we did not find a peg leg in the bar last night. We did find a whip, three socks, a box of twinkies, and one very drunk squirrel. Do any of these items belong to you? Eitherway, hobble on in and we can look for your leg together, that or I could just buy you a beer and we can call it even!
How bout it?
I just got out of the Washtenaw County jail and was hoping you would give me a job. I met a couple of your cooks while I was doing my time and they told me that you might give me a job.
What do you think? Are you willing to give a guy a break who done the crime but also did the time? Also, my new girlfriend was wondering if you would hire him to.
-Free at Last
Dear Free at Last,
Considering we do most of our hiring directly from the Washtenaw County jail, you sound like a shoe in! There are a few stipulations though- #1. Do you have any prison tattoos? We love tattoos...
#2. Are you well versed in prison lingo? You must be able to effectively communicate with the other members of our kitchen staff.
#3. You must have good prison stories, they are always good for passing the time.
#4. Warrants are always a plus, they keep us guessing as to who may or may not show up for work!
And what about this 'girlfriend' of yours? If he can hang in prison, he just might make it in our dishtank!
(good luck with probation, that is where the fun really begins!)
ps- tell your probation officer I said hello.
why or why
Why don't you have Bud on tap?
Dear Bud drinker,
What is the difference between Budweiser and having sex canoe? Nothing, they are both effing close to water! I hope this answers your question.
St Patrick's Day 2011?
I love your place, and want to bring my family there for St Patrick's Day 2011 to see Irish musicians, singers, and dancers. Will our dreams come true? Or must we go elsewhere? If so, any idea where a father on St Patty's day can have a Guinness with his family while we all watch such a show?
Dear Paul Hue,
Is the fat man heavy? Of course we are doing a real Irish St. Patty's Day at the Sidetrack. We are having Corned Beef and Cabbage, Irish Piquet, Sheppherds Pie and Potato Leek Soup. Live Irish Band, Fiddlers, and Bag Pipers will be playing all day and night. All draft beer is 3.00 a pint.
Come in for a good old fashioned Irish fun day!
I am lonely
I am so lonely, I just don't know what to do. How can I make friends? I have been through therapy and I have learned to dance but still, I make no friends.
I come to the Sidetrack but no one notices me. What should I do?
-lonely and blue
Dear lonely and blue,
You may be able to dance, but can you buy a beer with confindence and ease? We all know the quickest way to make friends is with free beer! Next time you are at the bar, buy everyone a round and you will be the most popular person in the joint! Plus, if you get everyone drunk enough, you can use your new dancing skills to sealthe deal. If that doesn't work, good ole' fashioned blackmail always seems to do the trick...
Hi Linda ~
This is your favorite sister inlaw Cheryl ~ I am sitting at conferences and I am very bored.
I was showing my friend Kerry your website, when I saw that I could email you right from here.
How are you? Do you miss me? I miss you!
When are we getting together to have some fun.
I really could eat some of your sweet potato fries right now. Could you send some over. Better yet how about some of fried pickle eggrolls. I am so hungry!
Okay I will end here, but I miss you.
Love you Cheryl
Yes it really is Cheryl Pisha
Dear cheryl pisha,
THIS IS YOUR BOSS, GET BACK TO WORK! There will be plenty of time for sweet potato fries on your break. Further, I don't this this is a wise use of company time or internet privilages... it may be time to review your work progress.
ps- The pickle eggrolls are in the mail :)
Sidetrack sighting in Vegas
Randi and I (and my cousin and her husband) spent a week in Vegas back in February. While walking through the casino in New York New York, I saw a guy in a Sidetrack t-shirt. I would have stopped and said hello, but I didn't want to mess up his winning streak. Cheers!
If this guy was wearing a Sidetrack shirt he wasn't much of a winner to begin with, eh? More than likely, the poor chap was in Vegas trying to win the money to pay his bar tab here in Ypsi! If you happen to run into him again, please tell him that time is running out and, if he doesn't pay up soon, he may be sleeping with the fishies in the near future. Good luck in Vegas!
From the hospital
Dear. Linda, my daughter is in labor in Florida and she wants a burger from Sidetrack. Any suggestions
Yeah, I think she should have had that baby at St. Joes! But not to worry- Walter Love is firing up his jetpack as we speak! The burger should be there in a jiffy!
Looking for a job
Are you doing any hiring??? I've got terrible wrists so waitressing wouldn't be for me. If you have any hostess positions please let me know!!!
Dear Unemployed chica,
We are always accepting applications, all you have to do is... Hey, wait a second, wasn't Terrible Wrists our house band in the 80s? Matty, is this you?! We told you, there is no way we can hire you after the whole bikini-fest disaster... Good try though!
Is the Sidetrack a gay bar?
Indeed, we are a very happy-go-lucky and fun-loving bar!
I am not finding the information I am looking for. I will keep looking.
Dear Jim Schueler,
Something tells me you may need some assistance... in more ways than one! (Hint: whatever you are looking for is NOT at the bottom of one of our incredibly large happy hour beers! This may be your problem)
My parents are regulars at your restaurant and most visits to Ypsi by me or my eight siblings (7 of us live in a different state/country) include a visit to the Sidetrack. It's a great place! One of my former exchange students is still wearing her "Beer is proof" t-shirt around Europe.
My question is really a request. Please sell gift cards on your website! I promise to be a regular! Many of us buy my parents restaurant gift cards for various holidays and birthdays. It's something they will definitely use and, when we can purchase them online, we can 'shop day or night regardless of our time zone. It also helps to compensate for not thinking far enough ahead to mail something. In other words, you'd help to make us look good and increase your business! Win-win!
You can actually buy gift cards online through our website....We need to send you a free shirt o send to that exchange student so he or she has a back up.
Send me your address through email email@example.com
Jsut checking something
and it obviously is not your spelling!
Once again, for the umteenth time in my life, I have been abandoned. This time it was a somewhat middle aged bald guy who flew the coop, left no forward, took some prized possessions ... basically just disappeared ... POOF!! I was wondering if I should go on the Oprah Winfrey show as an abandoned person or should it be the Jerry Springer show? How badly do you think I should kick him IF I ever see him again? Love, your friend, Debbie Kemp xoxoxo
Dear Debbie Kemp,
kick him? I say you should punch, slap and Indian burn that jerko! How dare he (and lots of other guys) leave a fine woman such as yourself? And screw Oprah and Jerry, you need to go on Judge Judy! Lets take this S.O.B. for all he is worth and retire to the Cayman Islands! Think of it, Debbie, You...Me... and all the pina colada carrying cabana boys we can handle!
I know you have a big burger, and a very big burger, but what about a Huge Burger? I come in all the time and often find myself ordering two or three of the Jesses Big Burger- but it just not enough! I love your burger so much- what would it take to order a Burger as Big as My Head?
Dear hungry harry,
It would take two buns the size of your....nevermind. No, seriously. We'd be glad to make you a burger the size of your head. Lettuce? Cheese? Tomato? A hat? Love,Linda
can't stop the beat!
I am a loyal happy hour customer of yours. I come in nearly twice a week and I just LOVE your big beers. My only problem is this- sometimes (especially after a few of those big beers) I just wanna dance! I am sitting at the bar, a great song comes on, there is a hot guy staring me down and I just want to shake my booty! Any suggestions? Can I just get up and dance around the dining room? Should I slink out to the parking lot and do a little jig? How can I satisfy my urge to boogie on down?
Dear dancing queen,
I remember you. You were the one with "big hair" and wearing the M.C. Hammer parachute pants! And as for the hot guy "staring you down", he was just wondering if you were going to finish your fries." Love, Linda
tax breaks for the rich!
I am a staunch Republican and cannot help but notice your obvious democrat leanings. From you 'greening' of The Sidetrack down to your support of Hilary Clinton, I cannot help but feel as though i don't fit in at The Sidetrack. With Barak Obama as the dems presidential pick, I now feel as though I don't belong anywhere in Ypsi! Whats a republican to do? How can I feel at home without selling out to you socialist freaks?
Dear Daddy Warbucks,
Yeah, a lot of people around here liked Hillary a lot. As a "staunch Republican", can I assume you missed "Pantsuit Day" at the Sidetrack? Here's something our Grillmasters in the kitchen came up with that might make you feel a little better.
The economy's just about failin'
Everyone's moanin' and wailin'
You like how things are?
With our President - Czar?
The vote for McCain and Ms. Palin!
Love and Kisses. And don't forget to tip! Linda
Need a job!
So I recently ran away from my service commitment in the Air Force. Can I have my old job back? You can't tell anyone though. I'll also need a new name. I hope you can help, I miss you and the black bean tacos...yummmmmmm!!!
Dear Gone A.W.O.L,
heck yes you can have your job back! We love drop outs, A.W.O.Lers, and escapees! As for the new persona- I think we should go with something bold, like Jack Hammer or Rod Rockwell. What do you think?
My husband and I are regulars at the 'trax and always look forward to a nice relaxing night there! We love trying all the different beers you offer. We both graduated from Michigan Tech, and really miss the "Keweenaw Brewing Company" beers! Being able to get KBC brews at the Sidetrack would be perfect! Can you consider adding some to your list? My favorite is their "Walt Whitbier" but I don't think that is distributed outside of Houghton. Of the canned beers that are sold in the local groceries, I like the liftbridge brown and husband likes the pickaxe pale ale. Please consider! Thank you!
Dear MTU techie,
Hello Techie, We now have the keweenaw Brewery beer in the can! We have the Pickaxe and others...
Why Doesn't My Roommate Just Come Out?
My college roommate and I have been living together off-campus at a nearby university for two years. I am 99% positive that he is gay. He seems to allude to it constantly, but never broaches the subject directly. Lately, he's become increasingly ornery, frustrated, and overall pretty difficult to get along with. I think that he would be a much happier person if he confronted his sexuality. I would like to speak candidly with him on the subject, but don't want to offend him. What approach do you suggest that I take? What if I am wrong?
Dear Meddling Friend,
Drink his beer!
To Drink, or Not To Drink
My roommate has left me alone for the weekend with a fridge of his rare, imported brews. They're incredible hard to get a hold of in the US, and he has trusted me not to toss them back while he's gone. On the other hand, he's knows I drink like a fish and left them anyway. What do I do?
-Import Thirsty Brew Glutton
Dear Import Thirsty Brew Glutton,
I know it gets crazy at the tracks sometimes and with my super camouflage abilities sometimes that makes me hard to see. Wanted to say a big kudos to your manager Jeremy for his keen super-powered vision- he noticed us, apologized, and waited on us (even though he was managing a very busy place). Always appreciate a man who can multi-task. Know where I can find one? Oh and three cheers for bringing back the chuck! Thanks! See you soon!
-Super Power Girl
Dear Super Power Girl,
You must have been the girl wearing the red brick patterned dress and the moose head hat! Nice outfit, by the way!
As far as a man who can multitask- I think they must have the ultimate super camouflage ability because I have never seen one! Cheers!
Those Lady servers
There are a couple of very cute little servers I am wondering about. I had heard others call one Kissle? and the others Jen. Do either of these ladies have boyfriends? I LOVE your burgers :-).
I hate to be the one to have to tell you this DJ, but both of those servers are actually men... but hey, you could still ask them out! (The burgers love you too!)
When I was at the Sidetrack last week you gave me a hug when I arrived. In fact, I always get a hug from you whenever I stop by. But lately I've been wondering:
1) Is it just that you have a thing for overweight, middle-aged bald guys?
2) Do you hug anyone who owns a Hudson?
3) Do you simply appreciate my business?
4) Does any friend of Jack's get a hug?
5) Is this your not-so-subtle way of telling me I don't frequent the Sidetrack often enough?
6) Do you hug EVERYBODY who walks through the door?
7) All of the above.
A Fellow Hudson Owner
-Fellow Hudson Owner
Dear Fellow Hudson Owner,
First of all, I definitely have a thing for overweight, middle-aged bald guys! Secondly, I have been trying to keep my Hudson fetish a secret for years (shhh!) Really though, if I could give each customer a hug, I would. Well, except for the smelly ones.
Sit a spell
It has become my lot in life to correct the spelling of CamAro. I appreciate all that you do to support the Chevrolet f-bodies and would rather you appeared knowledgeable. Your site references to the CamEro Superfest detract from your otherwise wonderfully wholesome presence. Thank you!
You are lucky we love cars and our 'car guys' more than anything because, under normal circumstances, we would tell you to stick your CamAro where the spell check don't shine! Just kidding... thanks for the tip!